A good session at Brands Hatch Indy circuit doing California Superbike School Level 2. Despite a heavy cold, I had a top time, in bright sunny weather. Learned a few things that really seemed to improve the speed of my riding around the track. After the first couple of sessions with what seemed like many people flying past me, something really seemed to click in the afternoon and I was able to up the pace substantially. Very satisfying to lap a Ducati 998R, a Blade and an SP1. And in the last session I managed to sneak past a Suzuki GSXR track bike that I had seen in the paddock with tyre warmers on. Get in. Of course, they would all say they were going slow as part of working on the new techniques. Yeah, right boys. (Man, I must learn to transcend ego and just ride for myself! Yeah, right dude).

Despite the fact that the skills taught at the California School undoubtedly work and have assisted many top class racers (James Toseland being one, apparently), I am tending towards the conclusion that in practice, most of the time, the California Superbike is a pricey track day for wusses. Lots of prosperous looking people (a few grey hairs around) on some very fancy kit, being taught the skills (being part of the high achievers culture, they need to get lessons even in their hobby) but even after the tuition, most of them (and I include myself in this category) would be seen off by a relatively lairy novice group track day participant. But of course, a pricey track day for wusses is fantastic. Exactly what you want, unless you are a true nutter or have real talent. This time out I learned a lot, definitely got faster (starting from my own (low) level, mind you), but without feeling like I was risking being killed by some maniac AND (here we go with the ego again) I got my left knee down for the first time. Unfortunately, there is no photographic evidence of this feat because the photographer did not seem to have been taking pictures at the corner in question. But the evidence is there on my slider if anyone wants to come and have a look. Here are some of the pictures I did get:

Another warning against the dangers of mixing drink and exotic food in a northern town, if one were needed. Apparently, you can get arrested even if you are a lawyer (although fortunatly the curry in Shere Khan in Rusholme last weekend when we were up for the football at Old Trafford passed off without any aggro, which is more than could be said for the match).

Cowabunga dudes, they are back (via Pete).

Following the announcement of the withdrawal of Microsoft MSN Chatrooms, after a revelation that Britain’s 52 million paedophiles are able to use these facilities to “groom” potential victims for abuse, a shocking study has revealed that due to a worrying increase in “technological literacy” among today’s children, it is possible that young people will still be able to communicate using such tools as Microsoft Instant Messenger and mobile telephones. Should paedophiles obtain instant messenger addresses or telephone numbers for these children, this disgraceful “grooming” process may continue, aided and abetted by “Big Business” such as Microsoft, AOL and Vodafone. And it gets worse. Even if these companies respond to popular pressure, put profit to one side in the interests of children and withdraw these services as well, it is possible that Britain’s youth will continue to be vulnerable to perverts through communication using the spoken English language or through letters sent via the postal service.

The only answer is therefore that new laws must be brought into force making any attempt to communicate, either orally, in writing or using sign language, with anyone under the age of 16 a criminal offence punishable with up to 5 years in prison. These new rules may create difficulties exciting challenges for parents and educators in bringing up and schooling this country's young people, but this is a small price to pay for protecting these children.

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What does anyone think about Microsoft shutting MSN chatrooms because they are sometimes used by paedophiles. Presumably, the benefit to Microsoft from running the free chatrooms was a forum to advertise itself and its own products and services, plus revenue from running ads for other companies. I wonder whether Microsoft have just realised it was costing them more than it was benefiting them and the paedophile thing was just the final straw/the excuse to get rid.

BBC modern manners quiz. I got 8/10, but I still think I am right about the two I got wrong.

Bump, bump, bump

Speed bumps infuriate me. Fewer pedestrians would be killed if cars had to drive at walking pace through built up areas. Well, obviously. But this has not previously been a requirement, because speed limits are a compromise between the rights of different people. Motor–vehicle drivers have a legitimate interest in getting to their destinations in a reasonable time, in reasonable comfort. Pedestrians have a legitimate interest in motorists being prohibited from driving at excessive speeds in built–up areas, which would make it difficult for pedestrians to cross the road without being put in danger of being hit by a car. The balance between the competing interests has been set at 30 mph. But now we’re going to put big bumps in the road so that although the speed limit is 30, if anyone does more than 10, they’ll soon start to feel sick and their suspension will collapse. But that way, we’ll cut road deaths. Well why don’t we go the whole hog and revert to medieval style rutted dirt tracks. That’ll slow people down, save a few pedestrians, and save a few quid on the cost of road building.

It’s ridiculous. Large numbers of pedestrians in town wander out like vacant morons. Why should we legislate for cars to go sufficiently slowly that if these idiots should step in front of a car, they won’t be hurt? Should we legislate for cars to be made out of fluffy wool as well? If you’re going to cross the road other than at a pedestrian crossing on the green man, employ the Green Cross Code and bloody well look to see whether a car is coming before you step out. Personal responsibility and respect for the rights of everyone. But what about the children, I hear you cry. Well that’s simple as well… parents, look after your bloody kids until they’re old enough to learn how to cross roads.

A quote from the article:

“But Transport for London, which has funded hundreds of humps to tackle rat runs created by the congestion charge, insisted that humps saved lives. The average speed on a road falls to 17mph after humps are installed. Pedestrians have a 95 per cent chance of surviving being hit by a car at 20mph. This falls to 55 per cent at 30mph and 15 per cent at 40mph. Using a study by the Transport Research Laboratory, TfL has calculated that 1,400 deaths and serious injuries would be prevented each year if a new 20mph speed limit was imposed on 60 per cent of London’s roads and enforced by humps”.

This is exactly the sort of thing that winds me up. Calling a particular route a “rat run” is tendentious. A “rat run” is just a road you go down because another road is too bloody congested or because if you go along another road, you’ll be charged a fiver. What’s the problem with that? Are the roads there to be driven along or not? You can’t impose a congestion charge to force people out of driving in certain parts of town and then complain when it works and they indeed avoid the roads covered by the congestion charge.

Pedestrian survival rates on being hit are one factor in this debate, but not the only factor. If the speed limit was 1 mph, even fewer pedestrians would be killed or injured. But all the drivers would be pissed off and no–one would get anything done. If it is decided, taking into account all the factors, that a 20mph speed limit in certain parts of London is where the balance should lie, then so be it. Given the traffic, you often don't do much more than 20 anyway. But speed limits are not “enforced by humps” any more than laws against burglary are “enforced by locks”. It’s insane to make the roads virtually undriveable, with attendant consequences for the emergency services, because a speed limit is set at a certain level. In my view, and without getting too jurisprudential about this, a law is basically only going to work if you have the requisite degree of support for it among the population — i.e we basically all agree it makes sense and will therefore generally abide by it — added to which an element of deterrence provided by enforcement from the police and the courts against any antisocial minority who continue to disregard it. We haven’t got it right yet with speed limits and speed bumps are not the answer.

Et-e-ket

A mate of mine told me about some fatherly advice his dad once gave him. "Son, there are a lot of people in this world" he said. "Most of them are wankers." [He might have said wonkers, actually.] Whilst I agree with the advice, he failed to specify that most of them live in London. Got on the bus this morning. It was rammed. Some bloke was standing in the middle of the bus with plenty of space behind him, meaning that the bus was a lot more crowded that it needed to be. Not wanting to be one of the wonkers that shouts "Could you move down the bus please!", I bustled past everyone to occupy the free space. Did people follow my lead, thereby freeing up space in the bus? Did they bollocks. Instead, I get tutted at as I move along the bus, and glared at because the bus now doesn't look as crowded as before, so the bus driver stops at every stop to let people on, instead of going past them. Apparently I'm the wanker. Making space for people, and I'm the wanker? [Stands on table a la Trent in Swingers and shouts: "I'm the asshole."] I've seen it on the tube too - you know, the attitude of "I'm on the tube, and I'm focked if I'm moving an inch to make space for anyone else get on." I'm gonna write a book on public transport etiquette. And next time someone behaves selfishly on public transport, I'm gonna smack them across the heed with the fockin book. (And it'll be a masseev book, cos it'll have chapters on pub/bar etiquette and quiz machine etiquette...) regards The Count of Montechrishto

Well it was a cracking weekend weather-wise so I thought it'd be rude not to go out on the bike both days…

An eventful couple of sessions…

On Saturday, I got the hang of public roads knee–down for the first time, playing on the roundabout just off the M11 at Stansted. Then on the way home, brimming with confidence, got some knee–down action around three of the corners on the Aldgate triangle complex, one right in front of a crowded bus–stop… get in!! Did a few laps to prove it wasn’t a fluke (or tail).

Then on Sunday arvo went out for a ride–out with a mate around Essex. Bit more knee–down action. Had some good fun practicing my California superbike school turn–in points and quick steering stuff.

Mid–way through the ride–out, disaster strikes — didn’t realise I’d stalled the bike (god knows how) going round a mini–roundabout and dropped it at zero miles an hour… oh no, my beautiful new bike… but fortunately the R&G crash bobbins I put on it totally saved my ass and there’s not even a scratch on the fairing.

So all in all, top weekend… I hope we get a couple more before Winter sets in…

So we are all criminals these days? The middle class no longer regard frauds such as padding insurance claims as wrong. I must say, the temptation to pad insurance claims would not be so great absent the perception that insurers are highly adept at screwing policyholders on their legitimate claims. So an insurance claim becomes almost like haggling. The temptation is to put in for 20% more than one feels one is entitled to, because the insurance company will often find reasons to beat the claim down by 30%.

Urban foxes are getting a bad name.

Some more medic slang.

I was impressed to see several people BASE jumping from the cliffs above Lake Garda. Seriously scary. Wonder if a bit of freefall parachuting would be a good way to address my vertigo issues?

I got back last night from a week away in the Dolomites in Italy. Spent a day on Lake Garda at either end of some hard walking in the mountains. Knackering stuff. On one day we ascended a steep scree slope which gained us 1000m of altitude in the one climb. It was real take two steps, take two breaths, slide back a bit, focus on the next step stuff. Various clip–on antics on some via ferrata also.